Saturday, March 26, 2011

Romance on my mind...

I'm sitting up at 12:45am, listening to the Eclipse soundtrack. It happens to be the song played in the background when Bella and Edward come close to making love. It's got me thinking heavily about romance tonight.

What is romance? I watch movies and sigh in want. You know, the scene on The Notebook where they lay in bed as an elderly couple and drift off to Heaven together. Or, movies like the Twilight saga where the two people are so madly in love they'd rather give up their own lives to save the other. But is this what we want in real life?

When Billybob Thorton and Angelina Jolie were married they each wore a vial of each other's blood around their necks. While others found this morbid and disgusting, I found it incredibly romantic. I had even planned on giving my husband a similar gift, until I found out he felt like the rest of America...EEK!

Now, I write romance...I breathe it, read it, write it, dream about it. But, each time I sit down to write, read, etc my image of romance is different. Is it what we dont' have? Is it what society tells us is romantic? Should I base all my stories on the same concepts as every other romance writer? Hell no, that would be boring.

But, if I write 'romance', and what I find to be the most romantic gesture (like when my husband told me to go ahead and spend the extra money to buy myself both a laptop AND a Dyson vacuum) isn't viewed as others as romantic, then what the hell am I writing?

My good friend, Norma Beishir, recently wrote a blog on our dream man. What is that? What is the true dream man? Sounds strange, but I found mine; he works overtime so I can focus on writing, he loves my kids as much as I do, and he tolerates my obsession with reptiles. Oh, did I mention he got me a cat for my birthday a few years back, even though he's allergic to cats? 

Sorry, I digress. Is our dream man flawed? Does he have the perfect body? Does he have...bodily functions of which we won't discuss? Or is he real? My ideal man doesn't have a hard body. Oh, don't get me wrong, I like a nice physique, but those 'perfect bodies' you see in ads spend entirely too much time in the gym, and don't allow themselves the yummy foods I love to cook. I want a man with a little extra meat on him. I want him to have a scar. I want him to cry when his heart breaks; but not cry because he stubbed his toe.

In my books, I always try to make both my lead characters flawed...but is that considered romantic? Should my heroine be perfect, without a hair out of place, no discerning characteristics, just your atypical heart shaped, pouty lips, full breasts, and an hour glass figure?

I'd love to know...what is your idea of romance?